From Horn OK Please to Horn(y) OK Please!

by Aman on August 24, 2011

Horn OK Please - Funny CartoonAccording to the latest results of the Durex Sex Survey (Yeah, it’s for real!), Greece has been named the Horniest Country in the world followed by Brazil and Russia. Needless to say, India doesn’t figure anywhere on that list. In fact, China is at No.4 (Trivia: almost 70% of the world’s sex toys are made in China) which means the more China’s Cultural Revolution thaws, the more its sexual revolution heats up. Now this is an embarrassment of sorts for us Indians considering the fact that it was we who gave the world The Kamasutra and taught them to have better sex! Just cause Russia is always cold and people feel the need to heat up doesn’t mean that we Indians have weak libidos.

On a more personal front, I’ll tell you why all is not lost for us. It’s been 6 months since I started this blog and readers have flocked from all over the world to catch a glimpse of my raw and ferocious talent :P. So I went ahead and did a little research as to how some of my readers landed on this awesome blog! And boy was I in for a surprise!

As you can see from the below image, there have been a total of 3000 plus unique visitors on my site with search engine traffic(meaning primarily Google) accounting for 60% of it.

Horn OK Please - Traffic Report

Out of these 1925 visits have come via search engines through a total of 591 keywords. Savvy ain’t it!

Horn OK Please - Google Traffic

But that’s not what got my grey cells ticking. About a month back, I wrote an insane post titled What the Fuckin’ Fuck. Now this was meant to be a hilarious post celebrating the language of abuses and something totally non-sexual. But guess what, most of the readers who landed up on that page came searching for something else to do with Rakhi Sawant and Ratan Rajput (since the post had references to their name). I mean guys, get a life. Rakhi Sawant and Ratan Rajput of all! Well, to each his own is all I can say.

Horn OK Please - Traffic from Post

Now this just ain’t it. I did another cool research to convince you people that we Indians have raging hormones!( I wish the guys at BCG & Mckinsey see this. Senior Analyst Job for sure). The last 7 days have been all about Anna Hazare & The Lokpal Bill with our media going into an orgasmic frenzy about it. But not even Team Anna could dissuade us Indians from searching for porn online! As you can see in the image below, Porn is ahead of everything else. And considering our Cricket Team’s performance, it’s no surprise to see Sachin fall woefully low in search volumes.

Horn OK Please - Google Insights

The coolest part is the peaking of porn searching online during weekends! Clearly, we Indians have nothing better to do on Saturday and Sunday. Reality Check for Abhishek Bacchan and the Idea Team. 3G or no 3G, the truth is that We, The Horny Indians, rock like no one else. I rest my case!

{ 9 comments… read them below or add one }

Malay August 24, 2011 at 4:18 pm

I think tujhe shaadi kar leni chahiye.. i dont know why I am saying this, but its the Jain Instinct that is espeaking..

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Aman August 25, 2011 at 6:56 am

Chup be Jain ke Bacche! it’s high time u got married with all these instincts in place 😛

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Ritesha August 25, 2011 at 11:07 am

I really enjoy your writing…..very witty…..and I started reading your blog coz I am a fellow O.S.

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Aman August 25, 2011 at 1:35 pm

Hey Ritisha,

Thanks for the compliment….yeah I remember u from school…Daniel was my batch…whr r u these days?

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Ritesha September 30, 2011 at 10:07 am

Hi Aman,

I am in Delhi. Shitij is in New Zealand, he’s practising law there. You can get in touch with him on facebook.

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Babita Farshwall September 6, 2011 at 9:01 am

Hey hi Aman,

Long tym yaa!!…just discovered ur write ups and laughed out to the fullest. Never knew that there was a writer in you. It was fun reading it. Keep up the good work.

All the best!!

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Aman September 7, 2011 at 10:23 am

Hey Babita,

Ya really long time ya…over a year i guess..how u doing n whr r u these days?

…glad u liked my writing 🙂

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Babita Farshwall September 8, 2011 at 5:22 am

Ya its an year…..me with make my trip these dayzz..Associate Editor….n going as boring as usual…lolz..u tell…watsyp?..how have u been all this tym?

n i must say, you have an awesome talent dude…ur write ups speak for u…..kuddos!!

Reply

Aman September 16, 2011 at 6:19 am

Thanks a ton 🙂 hopefully one day i’ll make it big as a writer!

Reply

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